


about love

by dykeforseulgi



Series: bad dracula [2]
Category: Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Domestic, F/F, Fluff, Vampires, former vampire slayer irene, some conflict but Overall It Is Fluff, some further insight into irene's character, vampire seulgi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-05
Updated: 2019-08-05
Packaged: 2020-07-31 13:45:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20116054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dykeforseulgi/pseuds/dykeforseulgi
Summary: irene has some issues adjusting to her new life with seulgi, but seulgi helps her out along the way.





	about love

After years slinking around, trying to get past vampires without their notice, Irene was an expert on the most effective ways to be as quiet as possible. When she and Seulgi first began living together, Irene used it as a defense mechanism, still feeling like she needed to keep these barriers up, to keep herself together and alive. It was irrational, but Irene had lived her life in fight or flight mode for so long, she didn’t know any other way. 

Irene was used to feeling less than, having to prove herself every step of the way, being told she was unworthy of anything but the life she had received. As much as she didn’t want to believe it, it was ingrained in her, and it wasn’t an easy thing to shake. Irene had lived her life with the bare minimum, and even now with Seulgi, who was definitely more than well off, she still thought that’s all she needed, all she deserved. 

Anytime Irene tried to take something, or was given it by Seulgi, who wanted the best for her, she was consumed with overwhelming guilt. Not only for what she was receiving, but for the fact that she enjoyed it. Irene liked having more, being able to experience things she never thought she would.

This guilt that had developed only contributed to her stealthy ways. Once she had discovered that she liked, that she wanted, more than what she used to be given, she felt she needed to keep that hidden. 

It began with food. Irene had experienced very little in that department, even with having traveled far and wide on her slaying expeditions, she always kept things simple. Seulgi, on the other hand, adored food. She kept plethoras of it in her house at all times. Irene wondered how one person could possibly eat as much food as Seulgi had. Her doubts quickly left her once she sat down for a meal with Seulgi, seeing just how much the vampire could eat in one sitting. 

Seulgi had no choice but to eat as much as she did, as she had a particularly low amount of blood intake. Seulgi was a non-human-killing vampire, so the only blood she ever got her hands on was the occasional stolen blood bag from a blood drive at the university she worked at. It was a rarity, feeling guilty even for that act, though much less so than if she’d gotten blood the more conventional way. 

So, to make up for the lack of blood in her diet, she had to eat far more than the average amount, which she was more than happy to do. Irene, though, didn’t know this at first, and was simply baffled by the other woman and just how much she managed to power through during one meal. 

Once Irene realized that food could be more than just sustenance, that it could actually be something she loved, something she craved, she was filled with guilt. When she wanted anything outside of a meal, she wouldn’t deny herself, but would attempt to go behind Seulgi’s back to get what she desired. Seulgi, of course, wouldn’t have cared, wanting Irene to have anything she could possibly wish for, but Irene was still stuck in that mindset, thinking nothing good could come of Seulgi knowing. 

She escaped Seulgi’s notice for a while, simultaneously feeling guilty for wanting to take the food in the first place, and for hiding it from her girlfriend. Irene was caught eventually, though. She’d gotten rather sloppy, slowly realizing that nothing bad would happen if Seulgi were to find out about her food escapades. 

It was rather late at night, and Seulgi was in the kitchen making lunch for herself for work the following day, as well as for Irene, who would be spending the day alone, as she did everyday that Seulgi had work. Seulgi had thought Irene was fast asleep in their bed upstairs, and she had been right, until Irene felt Seulgi’s presence slip away from her, waking her up. 

Irene had gotten rather sensitive when it came to Seulgi and being able to notice whenever she wasn’t near, consciously or not. No matter how careful Seulgi tried to be, any time she got out of bed and attempted to leave Irene there, sleeping, Irene would wake up anyway. Seulgi had thought she was safe tonight, though, seeing how knocked out Irene had been. She’d fallen asleep while making Seulgi watch one of the many dramas she’d gotten engrossed in during her long days alone. 

Seulgi’s responsibilities outside of work had often been getting shirked. Irene would rather she spend her excess time with her, preferably watching a television show, and Seulgi had no choice but to comply, wanting to give Irene the world, even if it meant getting nothing productive done. She tried to take advantage of the few free moments she had in her day, when Irene was particularly distracted, or in the few minutes when Irene would be able to sleep without Seulgi there with her. Seulgi saw this as one of them, and in her attempt at getting a task accomplished, woke Irene up as she usually did.

She wasn’t paying attention to her surroundings, more interested in the food in front of her, as well as writing a cute note for Irene to receive when she went to fetch her meal the coming day. It had become a habit for Seulgi to write Irene small notes that she’d leave throughout the house for Irene to see, one of the many examples of Seulgi going the extra mile to try to make Irene feel loved and comfortable in her new life. Seulgi’s lack of attention made for the perfect situation for Irene to slip right past her. Or, it would have been the perfect situation if Irene hadn’t still been groggy from her nap.

Although Irene had started to get sloppy, she’d never yet been caught. Seulgi wasn’t especially attentive, usually too caught up in her own head, or whatever task she was trying to accomplish in the moment, which made it all that much easier for Irene. She was elbow deep in the cupboard, just about to escape with a snack in hand, when she, mind clouded with thoughts of Seulgi and getting back to bed with her in tow, grabbed the bag of chips just a tad too hard, not thinking of the situation she was in, and the situation she was trying to avoid, causing a crunching sound. 

Seulgi quickly turned around at the noise, looking to see what it was. The last thing she expected to see was Irene, still wrapped in her blanket, hand gripped around the bag of chips, apparent culprit of the previous sound. Irene stopped in her place and her eyes grew wide, guilt growing across her face.

“Irene?”

Irene delayed her response, feeling the awkwardness and guilt grow stronger, “...Yeah?”

“What are you doing?” Seulgi said, sounding all too much like a mother who’d found her kid getting into something they weren’t supposed to be.

She delayed her response again, no longer looking at Seulgi’s eyes, but now staring at the floor below. Irene let out a quiet, “Nothing,” before attempting to take her bag of chips and go back upstairs.

Irene got a few steps away before Seulgi stopped her in her tracks by saying, “Hey, wait!”

Irene said nothing, only turning around to let Seulgi know to continue speaking.

“Is this...something you do often?”

Irene feigned ignorance, “Is what something I do often?”

“You know, take food. Without my knowing,” Seulgi paused for a moment, before realizing that she doesn’t want Irene to think she has a problem with it in the slightest, and adds in a frantic, “Not that I have an issue with it, at all. I just want to know.”

“...Maybe.”

“You don’t have to hide it. The fact that you do it, or you doing it at all. You have free reign upon anything in this house, I hope you know. I want you to be happy, Irene. And, if that means late night bags of chips, well, then, by all means, take what you want. I just don’t want you to feel like you have to keep anything from me,” her tone remained soft, hoping to convey to Irene how much she means what she’s saying.

Irene didn’t say anything, simply walking back over to Seulgi and wrapping herself around her in a hug. Seulgi more than happily returns the hug, staying silent for a while, enjoying Irene’s presence and warmth, before saying, “I love you, you know that, right?”

Irene stayed with her head against Seulgi’s chest, then turned to look up at her, nodding her head. She gives Seulgi a light kiss, trying to convey her love without having to explicitly state it. 

“You should go back to bed, you look sleepy. I’ll be there soon, I just need to finish this up,” Seulgi says while lightly brushing the hair out of Irene’s face and looking at her warmly.

She nodded once more, removing her arms from around Seulgi, grabbing the bag of chips and retreating back to their room. Irene didn’t have any more food related incidents from then on, pushing down the voice in her head telling her to hide it, and instead recalling Seulgi’s soft words to her that night. That doesn’t mean there weren’t other things Irene hid, though.

Irene liked Seulgi’s, and now her own, home. It was big, bigger than any place she’d ever had to herself, that’s for sure. Seulgi did well for herself, and it certainly showed. But, Irene had to stay there constantly. It wasn’t entirely safe for her to go out, with her being on a watch-list by her former employers. 

Seulgi tried to get her out of the house as often as she could, as often as she felt was safe for her, taking her on grocery trips and to an occasional event around town here and there just so Irene could experience such things. Irene appreciated these outings, getting very excited every time one would roll around, or when Seulgi would surprise her with one. The caution that they were forced to take took some of the enjoyment out of it, but it sure beat being cooped up in the house day in and day out. 

There was a while, though, where Seulgi had gotten particularly busy with work. That meant she didn’t quite have the time to orchestrate an outing for the two of them, and Irene was getting rather bored putting around all alone. There was a park right by Seulgi’s house, and Irene didn’t think it was too bad if she went down there. It was close, usually empty if you went on a weekday, she didn’t see any harm in it. 

There probably wasn’t any harm in it, really. Seulgi lived in a secluded area, and, either way, no one affiliated with Irene’s employers had any reason to be looking there, anyway. Seulgi had been presumed dead for months, and, with Irene’s reputation, she wasn’t questioned in the slightest when she reported that to them. Though, that doesn’t mean there was no reason to be careful. And she was careful, at first, at least. But, then she got bored once more.

First, it was not wanting to stay within the confines of the house, now it was not wanting to stay within the confines of the park. Irene didn’t act on her desires at first, worried about what would happen, especially if Seulgi were to find out. The food wasn’t so bad, but this was something else entirely. Eventually, Irene made her decision. She would start venturing out. Every day, she’d go out just a little bit further, for a little bit longer.

Just like with the park, she didn’t see the harm in it. Her face was concealed, she wore baggy clothing, no one would be able to tell who she was. That is, except for Seulgi. Seulgi, of course, would know exactly who it was, no matter what she wore, no matter how hard she tried to hide.

Still, though, Seulgi remained in the dark about Irene’s little excursions for quite some time. She was at work often, her mind occupied with thoughts of her students and their work. Seulgi always asked Irene how her day was, loving to hear Irene talk, especially with how little Irene did of it, but she never would have imagined that Irene would lie about any of what she told her of her days alone. 

One day, Seulgi had told Irene she’d be coming home on the later side, due to some meetings and such that she had to attend to. Irene saw this as an opportunity to get some time out of the house. What Irene hadn’t anticipated was Seulgi’s meeting being cancelled, and her coming home early to take Irene out, as a surprise. 

Seulgi didn’t expect to see Irene a little ways down the street, walking back to their house, when she was pulling into her driveway. Seulgi couldn’t believe it. She jumped out of the car as soon as she put it in park, leaving her belongings inside and the car door wide open. She quickly closed the gap between she and Irene, angrily strutting towards her. As soon as she was within reaching distance, she grabbed Irene’s arm, harder than she’d intended to, once again reminiscent of a mother scolding her child. Seulgi pulled her from the driveway to inside the house, isolating the two of them from the rest of the world. 

“Ow!” Irene exclaimed at Seulgi’s sudden grip.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

“Taking a walk,” Irene said, seeming far too relaxed, in Seulgi’s opinion.

Irene then began walking away, partly knowing she was in deep trouble for being caught, and partly knowing she’d get away with it in the end, so why care too much? That was a problem with Irene. She didn’t always see the error in her actions, only knowing it was a bad thing to be caught. She’d gotten pretty good, over the years, at finding ways to justify even the worst of what she did, and it was now instinctive. 

If her action persisted long enough, Irene could eventually see and acknowledge it for what it was, like she had with her job and what it entailed. That, though, took years before she was actually able to admit the fault in it. Irene was able to get out of any unfavorable situation she found herself, so she much preferred doing what she pleased and worrying about whatever consequence may come her way later.

Seulgi was taken aback by Irene’s behavior, and the way she blew her off. She scoffed, adding, “And where do you think you’re going?” onto the end of it. 

Irene didn’t reply, continuing to walk through their house and into the kitchen. 

Seulgi followed after her, saying, “You can’t do that,”

“Do what?” Irene interjected.

“Any of this. You can’t just act like I wasn’t speaking to you. You can’t walk away from me like that. And you certainly can’t leave here whenever you please,” Seulgi snipped back at her. She’d been coming across harsher than she would’ve liked. She preferred to be gentle with Irene, knowing this was all new territory for her, but this was crossing the line for Seulgi.

“Yeah? Who died and made you the boss of me?”

“Seriously, Irene? I don’t ask much from you, I really don’t. Can you just sit down so we can talk about this?”

Irene was suddenly stricken with guilt, turning back around and sitting down like Seulgi had asked her to.

Seulgi’s expression became softer, as did her voice, as she said, “For starters, I’m not mad at you. I’m sorry for acting like I did, it was too harsh, and I know it was. But, Jesus Christ, Irene, you scared the hell out of me.”

Irene didn’t respond, just watching Seulgi and listening to every word she said.

“I love you, Irene. With everything I have. That’s why I sometimes act like I’m the boss of you. I’m sorry if I suffocate you sometimes. I do what I do because I care about you, and I want the best for you.”

“If you wanted the best for me you’d let me leave the house once in a while. Without you. I can take care of myself.”

“I’m sure you can. That doesn’t change the fact that there are plenty of people who would rather you have your head on a pike at the moment. More people than just you, alone, could take on. You’re very capable, we both know that. But you still have to be more careful. At the very least, tell me. Was this the first time you’ve done this?”

Irene got quiet for a moment, before saying, “No.”

Seulgi sighed, then continued, “I love you, I’m gonna say it again, because I don’t think you’re hearing what I’m trying to say. I will do absolutely anything it takes to make you happy. If you’d told me you wanted some alone time out of the house, we could’ve talked about it, could’ve worked something out. But you didn’t come to me. You just went ahead and did it anyway. Why?”

Irene stayed silent.

“How long have you been doing this for, now?”

“A few weeks or so.”

Seulgi put her head in her hands, and then lowered them again to be able to look at Irene while she said, “Why did you do it?”

“I just wanted some time to myself, some time outside for once,” she hesitated before continuing, “I love you, too, but this is the first time I’ve been relatively free to do what I want. I don’t want you to become just another person who tells me what to do, or where I can and can’t go. I needed this, Seulgi.”

Seulgi’s heart ached at Irene’s words. She felt bad about what Irene had been through in her life, and she truly was trying to make it up to her, as if it were somehow her fault. Seulgi wanted to walk over to Irene and kiss away the sadness she felt from Irene and her words, but she knew she needed to remain firm in her standing, to be able to resolve the issue between them.

“I don’t want to become that for you either, Irene. I’m sorry if I’ve created that dynamic for you again. I just want to keep you safe, you know that, right?”

Irene nodded.

“I promise we can work something out about this, okay? We can set up a few days a month where you can go out, just you. I’ll drive you, even. Make sure it’s safe before I drop you off. Just, no more lies, okay? No more secrets?”

Irene nodded once more, and Seulgi finally did walk over to where Irene was sitting, kissing her just as she’d wanted to, then said, “Promise?”

“I promise,” Irene said, then gave Seulgi one more kiss before initiating a hug. She continued, saying “I’m sorry that I kept it from you. I’ll try to be more honest with you, I swear. Just please, don’t give up on me yet.”

There was desperation in Irene’s voice, more than Seulgi had ever heard come from her before. She could tell just how much Irene meant it, how much Irene believed that Seulgi could actually give up on her. As Seulgi held Irene’s face in between her hands, she saw tears starting to form in Irene’s eyes.

She wiped the tears away, saying, “Oh, baby, I would never. I could never, really.”

Irene sniffled, looking up at Seulgi, eyes mixed with fear and hope all at once, “Really?”

Seulgi smiled, “Really.”

Irene pulled her in once more, breathing her in, trying to remember this. This perfect moment, wrapped in the arms of a woman who truly loved her for who she was, no matter her mistakes, no matter her insecurities. She felt lucky, for what felt like the first time in her life. 

It was smooth sailing from then on, the two having a much better understanding of each other, and working out their problems in more constructive ways. There was one last thing, though, that Irene kept from Seulgi. This time it was something much easier to move past.

When Irene had begun living with Seulgi, Seulgi bought her a small wardrobe to get her started off. They were nice clothes, practical and comfortable, which is what Irene preferred. What Seulgi had overlooked, though, was sweatshirts. She hadn’t bought any for Irene, not thinking she’d need one quite yet, as it was still hot outside at the time. 

What Seulgi didn’t know, was that Irene loved sweatshirts. No matter the temperature outside, she liked being bundled up in something, it made her feel safe. She’d gotten rather attached to the blanket Seulgi had wrapped her when Irene came back to Seulgi after her confession, but Seulgi didn’t connect the dots that Irene may enjoy other such things.

So, she left Irene no other option, really. Irene had to steal Seulgi’s sweatshirts and other oversized garments. Not solely because Irene liked that safe, warm feeling of wearing something far too big for her, but because when Seulgi was gone, she missed her. At least when wearing her clothing, she’d be able to smell Seulgi, get a little bit of her even when she was away.

Irene would wait until Seulgi went to work everyday, then as soon as she was off the premises, Irene would steal Seulgi’s clothes. Steal felt like an awfully harsh word, Irene thought. She wasn’t really stealing, she was just borrowing them. 

It didn’t last long before she was caught, but this time, she didn’t much care. Her motives were purely innocent. She’d accidentally fallen asleep wearing an entirely borrowed outfit, right down to the socks. Seulgi came home, confused as to why Irene wasn’t where she usually was when she returned home, on the couch watching a drama, Irene’s favorite pastime. 

Seulgi walked up the winding staircase and down the hallway into their shared room, finding Irene bundled up and asleep on the bed. She smiled at the sight, then furrowed her brow when she noticed what Irene happened to be wearing. She walked up to Irene, confirming that she was, in fact, wearing her clothes. It only made her smile grow wider. 

She wondered if this was a regular occurrence for Irene, placing a kiss on her forehead, light enough so as not to wake her up, then walked over to her dresser to further investigate. Lo and behold, half of Seulgi’s comfiest clothing items were gone from their usual place. 

The hamper nearby had a couple of used articles of clothing placed inside, Irene’s doing, of course, but there was a great deal that was still missing. Seulgi walked down to the laundry room to find that Irene was currently running a load of laundry, filled with Seulgi’s clothes, she was sure. She then found confirmation, a small note, like the ones she often left for Irene, placed on the washing machine. It read, “Sorry I took so many of your clothes without asking. They’re warm and cozy and they smell like you. I had no choice, really.”

Seulgi laughed at the sentiment on the note, then went to join Irene in bed. She climbed under the covers, trying as best as she could to not wake Irene, but to no avail. Irene woke up, groggily, and moved to lay on top of Seulgi.

“Did you see my note?”

“Yes, I did.”

Irene whipped her head around quickly, saying, “You’re not mad, are you?”

Seulgi laughed, running her hands up and down Irene’s back, “Of course not.”

Irene laid her head back down on Seulgi’s chest, at ease thanks to Seulgi’s words.

Seulgi continued, “Though, I could buy you some comfy clothes, if you want. All you had to do was ask.”

“No. I like your clothes."

“Yeah?”

Irene nuzzled her head into Seulgi’s neck, saying, “Yeah. They’re all worn in, so they’re softer and cozier. And it all smells like you. That’s my favorite part.”

“Tell you what, then. You can have any of my clothes that you want.”

Irene looked up at Seulgi with a faint smile, “Promise?”

“I promise.”

Irene wasn’t perfect when it came to proper communication, but Seulgi was more than happy to wait for her to get there. She understood Irene more than anyone else ever had, and she knew that although it wouldn’t be an easy road, Irene deserved Seulgi’s time and patience to help her get to where she needed to be. 

Seulgi loved Irene more than anything, and although Irene had a much harder time admitting it, she knew Irene loved her, too. She was willing to wait as long as Irene needed, to help her every step of the way. She wanted to be everything Irene never had a chance at having, and she was. 

The two then laid in silence for a while, feeling completely happy and content in the other’s company, before finally falling asleep in each other’s arms.

**Author's Note:**

> some fluff after accidentally making bad dracula so angsty.. hope y'all enjoyed hehe i'm still planning a full sequel that i hopefully will get started on soon :~) i say this like In Every End Note but thank you chay for helping me teehee
> 
> twitter: posephdameron


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